Greatness is Self-defined; Self-created; and Self-maintained;

You want to be Great?

Don’t stop where you’re at and never get comfortable.

If it’s easy, you’re doing something wrong.

I can almost guarantee, you will suffer before you reach success.

Always trust intuition, especially if you want to get “it” right.

Don’t get it twisted, prayer works.

Keep your close friends close, F*** enemies and “haters”.

If you’re truly grinding you won’t even be aware of their existence.

Start your days with intention and complete tasks all the way through.

Understand the significance of FOLLOW THROUGH.

If someone is depending on you, get it done.

That being said, an individuals integrity means a lot and is extremely valued by others.

Handle YOUR business. The saying, “if you want something done right, do it yourself” is true!

However, don’t completely disregard a helping hand either;

at some point we all need guidance, help, and support.

Peace.

I recently celebrated a significant milestone in the start-up process of my non-profit organization, Empowering Youth Through Travel. We received our new logo and I cannot be more thrilled. As I was updating the organizations blog I made the statement, “I am a firm believer in celebrating each milestone that brings you closer towards your greater goals.”

In thinking further about this, I realized the significance of doing such a thing in life. It seems like many of us live our days void of feeling like we have made any progress in the things that matter most to us. However, it is essential to embrace a sense of accomplishment in everything that you do which brings you towards a greater goal.

For example, when I know it’s about that time to get the house clean and organized, I begin executing one task at a time. Washing the dishes, doing a load of laundry, folding the laundry… you get the idea. For each task completed, I stand back and relish in my accomplishment for a few moments. It may seem silly to do, but that one thing just brought me one step closer to my greater goal of having a nice, clean home. Additionally, that seemingly minor task took time and energy to complete. Therefore, I deserve to acknowledge myself for making the time and effort to do it, even if no one else sees it.

Too many times we focus on what needs to be done, and what has yet to be done. No matter how small or significant the venture, be it clearing out an old room full of junk, or starting up your own business, give yourself the credit you deserve in the process of making it happen. Try to loosen up and not be so hard on yourself. You are only one person and can only do so much. SO when you actually DO something, take a moment to give yourself a little pat on the back and keep it moving. It really does help you to look at the positives and move faster towards whatever the ultimate goal is.

A cold and snowy morning in the dead of a harsh, cold, Chicago winter, just three days before Christmas day, I was rushing to take my daughter to school. I locked my front door and as I turned around and looked down from my front porch, there were three wet, cold, and hungry kittens sitting under a parked car. They were looking right at me, crying out as though they knew that of all the people living on my block, I would be the one to take them in and care for them. Upon first sight these three little guys made my heart melt and I slowly went down the steps to approach them.

And Then There Was One…

The first kitten that walked right up to me

One of the gray and white kittens walked over to me, tip-toeing through the snow and meowing uncomfortably the whole way. He circled my boots, brushing up against them. I began walking back up the stairs towards my apartment and the kitten more than happily obliged to follow me, right through my front door. When I went back for the others they were gone. The man who’s car they were under had come to leave for work. I felt terrible, not knowing where the poor little kittens had run off to. I searched the block and looked under each car, but found nothing.

At this point, I gave up on the others thinking it was just not meant to be. I called a friend to see if she wanted the kitten. She was more than happy to take it but wouldn’t be able to pick it up until Christmas Eve. I made a veterinary appointment to have the kitten checked out and make sure it was good for adoption.

The Return of the Kittens…

Later on that day as I was leaving the house to go to the vet, opening the door to my apartment I saw the two other kittens under a car parked in front. I coerced them into my apartment with food and into a pet carrier. We were off to the vet…

Once we arrived at the animal hospital the veterinarian weighed each of the worried, meowing kitties. They were wet, dirty, and smelly. While there, my allergies began to take over me. My eyes began itching incessantly and I was sneezing and coughing uncontrollably. This was going to be rough. I knew that I needed to get these kittens adopted immediately.

The veterinarian took them to have their nails cut, bathed, and dewormed. They were given the thumbs up for adoption, and  I received news that upon careful inspection, the three kittens were all boys! They were estimated to be 8 weeks and all from the same litter. I felt like a proud mama as Dr. Schnitker had me come into the back to take a peek at the boys drying up from their baths in a warmer. The staff at The Animal Medical Center of Chicago took amazing care of the kittens and were so helpful. I couldn’t have ended up at a better place.

two of the kittens after their bath

We soon left the vet and made our way back to my apartment. One of these little guys already had a home, but the other two still needed to be placed. I text a few friends, posted on facebook and twitter, and yet no one replied. An ad on craigslist got a few interested individuals who once I contacted, were more aloof then anything and not serious about wanting a kitten. I began to get concerned because my allergies had me nearly incapacitated. I was losing sleep because I couldn’t breath, and the discomfort was beginning to be unbearable; there was no escape. I had now become the alpha mother cat to the kittens, being that I had saved them from the harsh cold, filled their little bellies with food, and gave them a warm place to sleep. They were immensely grateful, and showed it to me by cuddling on top of me, and climbing up the couch to lay next to my head. Being the animal lover I am, I couldn’t help but show these babies affection, even through my watery eyes, sneezing, and coughs.

By this time I had found a home for another kitten. A co-worker of mine came to pick him up. She told me that he was going to be a gift to her four nieces. I was holding one for my friend that would be coming to get him the next day, but there was one left. The morning of Christmas Eve, I woke up knowing that I needed to find the last little guy a home asap. I sent a mass text to everyone I knew asking them if they, or someone they knew wanted a kitten. Not long after, a friend of mine replied saying that she’d take him if no one else did. I replied saying, “He’s yours!” She came to get him that afternoon.

The First and The Last…

The last kitty left with me was the first one that made it’s way right into my apartment. He was the first to come and the last to go. When my friend came to get him, I was quite relieved and a bit sentimental. Yet, I was happy to know that each kitten would be spending Christmas with their new families.

Each kitty is now settling into his new home

Gilbert and his owner Cordell

Maxwell and his owner Eli

Louie on his way to the new family

Merry Christmas!

“When we are in competition with ourselves, and match our todays against our yesterdays, we derive encouragement from past misfortunes and blemishes. Moreover, the competition with ourselves leaves unimpaired our benevolence toward our fellow men [and women]. — Eric Hoffer

This post is an update on an older post of mine that you can view here.

When I initially wrote that piece it was posted in my Facebook notes where I had a lot of people comment disagreeing with my stance on the nature of competition. I humbly accepted their opinions, although I still maintained my feelings on the negativity that competition -competing with others- brings to your Self.

In retrospect, I believe my approach on the topic may have been a little strong. Additionally, I accept that my “anti-competition” view may have felt somewhat like a personal attack on individuals character, since we have been taught throughout our lives to be competitive. I want to take a different approach at addressing this topic, which I don’t expect to change anyone’s mind but to just better clarify the point I was trying to make in my initial post.

First, Competing with another individual is unnecessary because you are YOU and they are THEM. YOU have your own space and place in this Universe, with your own goals, aspirations, skills and talents, along with your own mission. The only person you can viably compete with, is your SELF. What you are set to accomplish in this lifetime is not and never will be dependent upon what someone else is doing. Whether they are trying to accomplish the same thing as you or not. Your success is not contingent upon what someone else is or is not accomplishing. The mark that you are meant to make here on Earth, will be made independently by YOU and your choices. Being better than, smarter than, better looking, or whatever than another person, does not guarantee you being or getting ahead in life and vice-a-verse. NO ONE can take away your power or ability to create and build your dreams and accomplish your goals. And since you cannot do that to someone else without breeding negativity in the process, then what exactly are you competing for?

I admit, it is extremely difficult to see someone else’s achievements and successes and not wish and hope for your own to come to fruition. If you adopt a competitive mentality, you will look at other individuals as those you have to top, one-up, or beat to either achieve the same level of status, or higher. In doing that, you are creating a significant amount of negative energy inside of yourself which will run over into the life experiences you encounter. You become jealous, you envy, you are judgmental and critical of yourself and what others are doing, and the most unfortunate of it all is that you are not content with the accomplishments you have made. Nor are you happy for or wish well those around you who are reaching their dreams, and/or executing their goals.

The energy you put out into the Universe through the intentions of your thoughts and actions will be exactly what you get back. The more you compete, the more you will be competed with. The more you isolate yourself from others who you fear are trying to get what you want, the more others will isolate themselves from you. Conversely, the more open you become to working with others on helping them achieve their goals in life, the more open people will become to helping you get to where you seek to go in life. The happier you are for others and their success, the more success you will meet in your own experiences.

In essence, strive to be less external and more internal with how you approach the things you want to gain out of life. Instead of looking at what others have or are doing, look at how you can better your SELF to foster your own greatness. This is an abundant Universe that wants the best for you, so long as that is what you want for yourself. Have faith that you are not alone in your endeavors, and with patience and persistence, along with love and compassion for others, you WILL reach the top.

–

I came across this amazing quote reading Gary Zukav’s book “Spiritual Partnerships”, where he discusses the evolution of humans from “five-sensory” individuals to “multisensory” individuals:

“As five-sensory humans become multisensory they are attracted to new goals. Cooperation becomes more attractive than competition. Sharing becomes more attractive than hoarding. Harmony becomes more attractive than discord. Reverence becomes more attractive than exploitation. As you begin to travel toward these goals, the reflection in the mirror changes.”

Move past and evolve beyond the archeic idea that competition is “healthy” or fuels better results from individuals… expand your range of ability, tap into you souls energy, ask for clarity and focus, and be confident that you have been provided with everything you already NEED to get you where you are trying to go…

Something about blogging makes me nervous. I think it has to do with people reading and judging my thoughts. It’s a scary idea to consider, for me at least. Additionally, I am horrible at keeping up with posts. The whole blogging world is really overwhelming as well. I feel, well, I know that people are way more advanced in this area. What do I know about maintaining a blog? I just have some ideas, and want to talk about them every two, four, or six months. I have been considering a new approach. I realize this is something that I have to work on within myself. I also have some new ideas that I’d like to implement, and am starting to realize that it’s not that serious.

Ultimately, I need to let go. I have things to share, ideas, and thoughts, that I am sharing for the collective benefit of us all. I always appreciate when others share their knowledge or wisdom with me, or write content that inspires or provides me with a different perspective. I think that’s what we all need… we need to be forced to think a little, or a lot. We need to have quality over quantity. I am not seeking to become some well-known, established blogger. I don’t have a tenth of the time to make that happen regardless… however, I would love to know that what I share resonates with at least one person. That would be the greatest reward.

I watch people in our society operate daily on a frequency that I cannot quite understand anymore.

I begin to wonder, how can change truly be manifested in Our Selves, Our Youth, and Our World, if people don’t understand where their motives stem, or how to better connect with the Self, to better connect with others?

Clearly there needs to be a change among and within us, ALL.

An awakening that transcends the disconnect between individuals,

the disconnect between humans and nature,

and with the Universe, in its infinite wonder…

Acknowledging the Ego’s existence, it’s control over one’s thoughts, motives, actions, wants, and desires, may allow an individual to gain a greater consciousness, and awareness, of Being.

It can allow one to better understand the significance of the Self, in developing a higher connection with the Universal Creator (whatever that means to you), along with other beings whom we share this world with, in a physical and ethereal sense.

This is what is really meant when “they” say, “Change Starts With You.”

It begins with IN your Self.

So I wonder…

Which do you know better, Your Ego, or Your Self?

What does this mean to you?

Something to consider.

“The most common ego identifications have to do with possessions, the work you do, social status and recognition, knowledge and education, physical appearance, special abilities, relationships, person and family history, belief systems, and often also political, nationalistic, racial, religious, and other collective identifications.

None of these is you.” — Eckhart Tolle

“The ego sometimes we look at it as if it is an entity. But really it is just a form of unconsciousness. It appears to be an entity sometimes. It is never threatening. Never regarded as an enemy, never something you need to get rid of. It’s only to be recognized for what it is.

So, and then the ego has fulfilled it’s purpose. It has taken you to that point of awakening.
So, in order to awaken…humans have…were in the state of oneness with the source when they first came here and when they first lost themselves. They lost themselves in thinking, they lost themselves in the mind, they lost themselves in ego. And then they reached the stage where this state of being lost produces so much suffering that this dream of life becomes a nightmare, and they start waking up. This is the stage we have reached now. So as we wake up, we regain the state that we once had, that we lost. The state of oneness with life, oneness with source. But when we regain it, we regain it at a deeper level, because we are conscious of it now.” –Eckhart Tolle

Peace and Blessings.

I just thought about the concept, what if there were no mirrors? No reflections. No cameras to take pictures.

If we walked around, never knowing how we “looked,” would there be such an emphasis on the physical? On the material?

Would we be more inclined to work on enhancing our inner selves versus our outer shells?

Would how a person looks even matter, or would that concept be so trivial and unevolved? In this time, this reality of ours, as a collective, we spend most of our time –days and nights– focusing on enhancing everything on the outside, and barely any significant time on what’s inside…that which, from a universal perspective, in an ethereal sense, is what really has any relevance.

Can people really even let go of the material? If that didn’t exist for them, I wonder what would? What would people have if you took away all that centers around this outside, illusory, existence? If money, clothes, and cars no longer determined status. If beauty was no longer gauged by the physical self. Magazines would go out of business. Beauty products, clothing stores, gyms, etc.

What if the standard was how deep one connected with their self, and how in-tune an individual was with the collective consciousness of the universe. Or what if music and other forms of entertainment aided in expanding and attaining a higher level of consciousness, versus having us thinking about chasing paper, sex, violence, and infidelity. Or if it actually united man and woman, over continuing to erode the male/female connection.

Are we just pawns in this world? Are we that weak that we allow others to determine what we deem to be of value, of significance? Are we that stupid to allow these forces to continue to divide us? To keep our souls imprisoned and our minds in constant states of want, like little children and their developing egos. Adults are no different, swayed by the media, by entertainment, by money, showing them what they should be looking like, smelling like, how they should be living, what they should be wearing, and just as children we look, eyes wide open, for others to tell us what is cool, what we should be doing, and then make moves accordingly, doing our best to act out that role, redefining our egos every time, buying into the bullshit, literally and figuratively. Just eating it all up. And in the end, we feel so empty.

Is that you?

Don’t look in the mirror.

“What’s your soul’s reflection?”

For the past two days, I have gotten up at 6:30am, groggilly reached over and grabbed a sheet of paper that outlines your Chakras. The sheet was given to us, in hopes that we would get up every morning, and meditate before our day. According to the handout, “Chakras are vortexes of energy in the body.” There are 7 main Chakras we were told to stimulate by rubbing. I committed to this, and wanted to do as much as I could to receive maximum benefits from this detox. So as the paper says, I began with rubbing my coccyx, the first major Chakra. For those of you who are unfamiliar with what the coccyx is, in layman’s terms it is your tail bone, or the end of your spine. This chakra represents “survival”. 

Now I must say, if you’ve never felt your coccyx before, it is definitely a strange feeling to the hand and the body. Nothing sexual for all you who have your mind in the gutter. As I rubbed my coccyx, I thought to myself how interesting it is that I have never touched this part of my body? It was literally a foreign place to me, and yet it is a part of me. I can’t say anything spectacular happened with rubbing my Chakras. Yet controlling my breathing did allow me to focus and relax. It significantly slowed down the typical rush-and-go process that happens every morning.

Normally, I’d start my day pushing the snooze button about 5 times, only to realize I’ve slept to the last possible minute, and then jump out of bed and rush to get myself and my daughter ready. This meditation process forces me to get up, and allow myself a quite, peaceful 15 minutes or so to actually, WAKE UP! I would highly suggest it to everyone. In that time you begin your day with “intent”. For me, intent is what I want to accomplish that day, how I want my day to go, and preparing myself, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally for that to happen. The past two days have not been void of stress, but I’ve been MUCH calmer, and less reactive to particular stressors.

Things have honestly been going great. Yesterday I was running off little sleep, so I really felt the fatigue. Last night I made it a point to go to bed earlier, and it has made the world of a difference. I went to Bikram yoga class today, and it was a challenge. I haven’t done it in about 5 months or so. However, I still received maximum benefits from it. As I write this, I feel so focused, and energized. I drank a cacao and banana shake this morning, yummy! I just went to the raw food restaurant, and had a green drink, a shot of wheat grass, and a juice drink made with apple, zucchini, and carrot juice… it was very tasty. I just ate one of my raw meals, and I am nice and full. Yet, being “full” from a raw meal, is not a heavy feeling. You know how after you eat a huge cooked meal, you pretty much want to lay down and sleep? On the contrary, I am alert, and vibrant. I feel amazing, and it’s only the second day!

I do have some advantages compared to some other individuals in my detox class. I am not a smoker, I rarely ever drink, I’m not a coffee drinker, or drug user. My biggest vice was SUGAR! Although, I haven’t suffered so much yet from sugar withdrawals. Mainly because much of the fruit has sugar, and curbs that craving. Cacao is very chocolaty, so that cuts out my craving for chocolate. The hardest part is coming home and wanting to snack. I am used to grabbing something and sitting in front of the television. That “something” I usually grab is either sugary or salty… SO, yea… that takes care of that. I just decided that I’d cut out the TV as well, to make it less tempting to eat cooked foods.

I am anxious to see what other results come from this experience. So far, I am feeling like a completely different person then I have in the past few months. I’ve already started on some of my major goals, and I feel very confident that only good this will come from this experience. Oh yea, I also managed to “acquire” a job yesterday! ;D

I sit here on the eve of my detox, a caramel apple on my plate. I forgot I had it in the fridge, and I just couldn’t bare throwing it away before embarking on my 28 day raw food diet detox. I figure I have a good 30 minutes before the stroke of midnight to indulge… (takes huge bite of caramel apple)… Damn, this tastes good!

Lately, I’ve been feeling the adverse effects of a poor, low fiber, high sugar, salt, and fat diet. I am typically quite disciplined, and hold to a fairly strict diet and workout routine. Somewhere along the way, I lost it. I seriously LOST IT. I lost my sense of being, awareness, energy all messed up, and stagnant. We all go through it. Some people more than others. Some of us are in a permanent state of this, that they don’t know any different. I on the other hand, DO.

I am in the process of job “acquisition”. I decided to call it that because I felt it had a more positive flare, rather than job “hunt”, or job “search”. Both of those descriptions allow for negativity to seep in. As though the ability for you to not get a job, is actually plausible. To me, I don’t want the thought of me NOT getting a job to be a reality. So, job “acquisition” it is!

Point being, going through the job acquisition process, I couldn’t help but realize my current state of low energy, poor eating, gaining weight, constipation (I know, too much information), laziness, etc… Has caused for my confidence level to drop, along with my self esteem, and overall connectedness to the “Self”. I KNOW, this is infringing on my ability to acquire a job, and I cannot allow my life to be taken over in such a way.

For almost a month now, I’ve been struggling to reach some point of normalcy. However, I’ve allowed myself to slip even further down a dark hole in the process. I came to the realization that. I NEED HELP! All kinds of help. Mental, emotional, physical, spiritual, you name it, I need it! At the same time, I also realized that the only person who can help me, is me!

This, is where the overwhelming feeling comes over you, because you don’t even know where to start. You’ve convinced yourself to this point that you are in the state of being you’re in, because of outside forces. It’s x, y, and z’s fault, not mine. Oh boy. Well, for me I now see that it’s all me. The opposing, negative, SOB forces will always be at play. They will always be there to try and sink they’re sharp, toxic, and ravenous teeth into you. Either you stand there and let it happen, run like hell, or you put two fists up and fight back. I guess I just layed down and said, “come and get me”. I practically got eaten up like a bag of Lays potato chips! I allowed myself to be where I am today, and I’ve now made the decision to 1. enroll in this detox for 28 days and 2. start back working out, with a combination of pilates and Bikram yoga. There are other personal goals I will share later, but those are the two that take precedent. I have to regain balance, inside and out. I need to put the best foods in my body, cleans out the garbage inside, and mentally and spiritually cleanse. It’s all connected. From there, I will work on other goals.

Tomorrow, I am waking up at 6:45am to meditate, and start my day with “intent”. This is what we were told to do for the detox. Then I will take a number of different herbs. I will take my shower, eat a piece of fruit for breakfast, get my daughter ready for her first day at her new school, and be on my way.

Wish me luck. I know the first week will be ridden with withdrawals of various foods, especially my horrible addiction to sugar. This is not just a food challenge, it is a mental, spiritual, and physical challenge as well. I intend to regain a sense of awareness and consciousness. I want to increase my energy flow, and be able to focus more on the tasks at hand, and the goals in which I have set for myself. At the end, I’d like to continue with the raw food lifestyle, even if I’m just 80% raw. I want to connect with my body, and my mind, and transcend this shell I live in. I have recently created a hell on earth for myself, and I don’t ever want to come back here again. I will keep you updated daily as to what I’m experiencing and feeling throughout this process.

is in that moment that we realize we’re not.”  – Brian Kessler

Control.

We have none.

Yet, we fight, internally and externally to have it. We want control over ourselves, others, and our lives. It is easy to fool ourselves into believing that we do have control. However, we confuse control with our ability to make choices.

We make choices all the time, sometimes we follow through, and many times we falter. Not because we’re weak, or lack self-control, but because we choose not to go through with the choices we’ve made.

Control over others.

Unfortunately, this is probably one of the most detrimental types of control we can possess. It’s harmful to us, and the other person. Sadly, wars are created over the desire to control. Fights. Resentment. Rebellion. Yet, the reality is that we cannot control others. Ultimately, other individuals are going to do what they want to do. It is free will and their God given right to do so. Therefore to exert control, or feel anxiety for the lack of control you feel over someone, is pointless. 

You can express your emotions, beliefs, ideas, and opinions. However, it is the other persons decision, whether they want to listen, respect what you say, and take heed your requests. Even if they respect what you say they still may not agree, and in the end make the choice to do what they feel is best for themselves.

Consequently, what we do have control over is our choices, our actions, and our Being…

What we don’t have control over are outcomes and others.

I believe when you let go, like seriously LET GO, and relinquish the desire to control others, yourself, and LIFE… Everything has its way of falling into place. Not necessarily a place of “perfection”, such as where you would have it be if you had the control to make that happen. More like a place where you are finally content with what IS, and not with what ISN’T. This release, will bring you a new found freedom to live your life in the mystery.

Our futures are unknown, whether we like it or not. We can make particular choices, plan, outline, set goals, and even achieve them…

but right NOW is what you’re living for.

Enjoy yourself, stay positive, and LOSE CONTROL! ;D

“Control is never achieved when sought after directly. It is the surprising outcome of letting go.” – James Arthur Ray